I can only offer my prayers

Right now, I don't think there would be any words of consolation that one can offer to two of my good friends who lost their first baby just one week before he was due to see the world.

And so I can only offer my prayers to them, that they may be strong in this faith shaking moment.

I am deeply shocked and sad about this. I myself could not understand why things could be so ironic. And I thought it was actually another one of my answered prayers, because I remember that one time in the cab last year when we talked about their longing to have a child, which for years they had been trying to have. I told them to keep their hope and faith, that in the right time it will happen. I prayed for them, for God to grant them their wish. And what joy I had when I learned a few months later that they were finally expecting a baby...

But there are things which are beyond our comprehension. I still do believe there is a reason for everything, for all our challenges, no matter how faith shaking.

I wish I could give comfort to them. But for right now, I think that the best thing to give are silent prayers.

Blessed be.

Tennis and beer

Ok, I'm gonna try something new -- I am going to write something right now, when I am a bit tipsy from having some beer with my good friends, my tennis buddies Chris, Janine and Sherrie.

So tonight we had our last tennis match for this year. We had been playing doubles for a couple of months now, with Janine and Chris playing together against me and Sherrie. Janine and Chris are a couple from Germany who are here in Singapore for study. Next week they would be going on their holidays in Australia then they'd be back in Singapore and will be here until the end of February next year, and then they return back to Germany. They used to be my neighbors too until they moved out last month. Sherrie is my Singaporean neighbor, whom I play tennis with during our tennis lessons until we decided to play singles on our own once a week and then another day once a week with Chris and Janine.

Anyhoo, going back to beer, so tonight we decided to switch partners. I played with Chris and Sherrie played with Janine. Chris and I won the first round: 6-4. On the second round, it was a tie at 6-6 and we didn't have enough time to do a tie breaker. Then we went to a nearby hawker to have some beer and oh boy, I don't know if it is because it was Tiger beer, or if it was because I have not had beer for about month, or if it was because I was tired from tennis, but I cannot believe that a couple mugs of beer would make me this tipsy. Yikes. I don't even know how I am going to take a shower now. All I want to do is to just lie down on my bed and sleep. But nope, not with my sweaty tennis clothes on so I have to go and get that shower.

Ok, I think so far I am still making sense, right? This would really be interesting to read tomorrow, when I am all sobered up and in my senses. Well, I am not really drunk drunk, just what I said, I'm just tipsy, hehehe. You know, there's this famous Filipino writer in the Philippines, Nick Joaquin, who can write his masterpieces when he is drunk. Maybe I could try to be his female version? hehehe.

Anyways, I just want to say that this was such a good night and I am just so happy to have my tennis buddies, they are such a joy to be with. It is just funny to discover that this is the effect of beer on me after tennis.

That's it.

hehe. :P

Will you take a chance?

On yellow and purple roses that say:

"I want to be your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye"?

I need blueberry cheesecake

Right now.

Badly needed.

Please, please, please, I need a blueberry cheesecake.

The Happy Long Weekend

Was brought to you by:

Bellini Grande
McDonald's
Sizzler
TCC
Geylang
Raffles Place
Boat Quay
Harry's
and McDonald's (again)


Yes, let's just be fluffy! woot! ;)

The little black dress

I think there's this little black dress which every woman should have. The one which makes her feel sexy and confident about her look. And I found mine (although it's not so little really) :) Then I also found the perfect belt to match it with and voila! I got the perfect outfit! I wore it to work today and a number of my lady colleagues gave me compliments, they loved my belt most especially. I love it too!

And the great thing about it is that I even got the dress for a good price, quite half the usual price for a dress here.

Dress: Tom & Stephanie department store at West Mall in Bukit Batok, Singapore (S$30)
Belt: Reds boutique at West Mall in Bukit Batok, Singapore (S$49)

(Yeah, the belt is even more expensive than the dress! Haha :P )

Since the belt was already sparkling with glass, the accessories/jewelries shoud not be sparkly too so I just wore pearl stud earrings, I didn't wear any necklace and bracelet.

For the shoes, plain black high heeled sandals were the best match. ;)

Allez! Allez! Allez!

Félicitations à moi! (Congratulations to me!)
Pourqoui? (Why?)
Parce que aujourd'hui, j'ai suivi ma classe française, pour toutes le trois heurs! (Because today, I attended my french class, for all the 3 hours!)
~~~~~~

Yes, I've resumed having my french lessons 6 weeks ago. It was not easy to do it, because I've stopped for months and I had a lot to catch up, (although I did still read all these french emails everyday at work). Plus, the very important factor that it adds to my frustration at work because I feel like it is an extension of my work hours so I've never been that enthusiastic about learning it. Three consecutive hours of lessons one day of each week can be very heavy, I tell you.

Anyhoo, I'm just very glad that I got myself to go to class today. I've actually missed the past two classes already because I was able to find some "good" excuses - I was a bit not feeling well the two weeks ago and last week I just felt like I've had too much of the french for that day and I couldn't take in some more. In my homework, here's what I even wrote down:

Quels sont vos désirs ou vos projets? (What are your desires or projects?)

Je voudrais quitter mon travail et étre écrivaine. (I would like to quit my job and become a writer.)

And I was sooo tempted to skip it again today but then I knew that if I don't attend today's class, I would most probably skip the rest of the remaining 3 lessons altogether. Oh la la! Ce n'est pas acceptable!

So how's my French now? After having completed my elementary French, well, I am happy to say that I can read fairly well. I can write fairly good but which takes A LOT of effort and I still have to remember to put my adjectives in the right gender form and most of all, remember all my verb conjugations! For my listening comprehension and speaking, well they suck! :( I need to improve here big time.

Oh well, the important thing is that I am learning. I may be slow but I will get there!

Allez!

My (oh my gosh I'm really 29 now) birthday!

It's actually my little sister's birthday today. (Happy Birthday sistah!!!) But let me take this opportunity to write about my birthday two weeks ago (haha, hey, this is my blog anyways :P ). I won't let this month end without blogging about it!

My birthday seemed to have been like 5 days long. Started on Friday, the 15th, when I had a big dinner with my very dear friends, Ays, Diovs, and Omar at the airport before I took my flight to the Philippines. The 16th, I met with my Travbuddy Philippines friends, where we had dinner and spent the rest of the night til the wee hours of the morning drinking and talking, talking, talking at Jenn's place. It was fun to hang out with them again and its worth going home at 7am the following day and worth being prejudged again by another taxi driver who couldn't keep his mouth shut from saying a perfectly annoying comment to start a conversation: "Ma'am mukhang galing kayo sa boypren nyo ah" (Ma'am, you seem to have just gotten out from your boyfriend's place). In my mind I gave him one very good uppercut.

Anyhoo, Sunday, was a big buffet lunch of Japanese, Filipino and American dishes with my family at a restaurant. Then dinner and coffee with my bestfriends since highschool: Melanie, Debbie, Maebel and Alison.

On Monday, my actual birthday, most at home almost forgot that it was my birthday, including me! But well I had to remember it because I spent the whole morning renewing my driver's license. And I got greetings thru sms and IMs from friends: from Singapore, from the Philippines, from Ireland (hi miswa Nina!), from Canada, phone calls from my sisters, messages in Facebook, etc. And here's more - I got a very sweet surprise of a dozen pink roses from my chili friends :)

I wish I had more time in the Philippines, I wanted to meet some more good friends (like Mhe, Ate Prime and some friends from highschool) and spend some more time with my family but 3 days will never be enough! :(

Anyhoo, I didn't cry on my flight going back to Singapore the night of my birthday. It was the first time I spent a part of my birthday on the airport and airplane. I arrived at 1am and found a gift on the dining table from my sweet flatmates.

The following day, I was back to work and I wasn't expecting anymore surprises but..first I got a nice bunch of flowers with chocolates and a cute sheep from Boy Libog, who up to now I still don't know who really is. Then another set of beautiful and fragrant flowers from my family in California. In the afternoon, two of my colleagues (my lunch buddies) made a little party in the pantry for me, they brought some very pretty handmade cupcakes (made by another friend of mine and her daughter).

Wow, that's quite a lot to feel so very special, huh? And I have not even mentioned the birthday gifts I got including those heartwarming blog entries of Diovs and Nina.

Ok, I hope I have not forgotten to mention anything else, but if I did, please excuse my short term memory lapse, I'm getting old, heehee :P

Conversations of the day

Morning

chili f: lech na mga lalaki kasi yan e!

chili a: hahaha

chili f: alam mo kung family and friends lang ang kailangan sa buhay, sobrang satisfied na ko

chili a: same here!

chili f: lecheng void lang kasi sa heart, parang may space talaga na naka-reserve sa romantic love na hindi ma-fill ng filial love

chili a: truly

chili f: kaines no?

chili a: sobra. though ako di ko talga hinahanap, may talent ako magrepel ng romantic love eh, di ko alam kung bakit

chili f: ayoko na rin hanapin, pero kumukurot sya ng kusa! hahahaha

chili a: hahaha, may ganun

chili f: may ganun nga, hahaha

chili a: my heart beats the name of *toot*, *toot* pa rin. Walang ibang alam na beat kundi yun

chili f: nye, bakit 2?

chili a: hahaha, oo, i can love both at the same time

chili f: ah kasi yung heartbeat dalawa? hahaha

chili a: korek! hahaha. The thing is, both are just ideas, di na sila totoong taong minamahal ko, idea na lang. hahaha

chili f: hahaha, ang kulet! i have to remember this conversation.

chili a: sana in the coming months, tao na mamahalin ko, di lang yung idea, hihihi

chili f: ako rin!

Noon

frenchbread: Twenty years ago, there were more rules to follow. Today we have less rules but there is more pressure on the individual.

frenchfries: Sometimes, I think it's better to have more rules. More choices can be more confusing...

Afternoon

Annoying Caller: hi, this is blah blah from blah blah blah enterprise...you won a Takashimaya voucher worth $100, just bring your husband to Ngee Ann City..

Annoyed Me: uhm, sorry, who are you calling for?

Annoying Caller: I'm blah blah from blah blah blah enterprise

Annoyed Me: No, I mean, who are you looking for?

Annoying Caller: It's for you, you won a Takashimaya voucher worth $100, just bring your husband to Ngee Ann City.

Annoyed Me: Where did you get my information?

Annoying Caller: We only have your number.

Annoyed Me: Well, you see I'm still single.

Annoying Caller: Are you over 35 years old?

Annoyed Me: No. Your information is wrong.

Annoying Caller: Oh, sorry.

This is creepy

Before going to sleep last night, I read the first few pages of Veronica Decides to Die by Paulo Coelho (I've read this book before).

And last night I dreamt that I was bitten by a snake, which was like a cross breed of a cobra because of its head, and a rattlesnake for its tail. The bite didn't hurt, as only one fang bit my right leg, and the snake almost missed my leg when it attacked.

It took some time before a doctor arrived, but it was like nobody panicked. Then when the doctor finally arrived my right leg started to turn brown and it went up to my right arm, my shoulder and I started to panic. But the doctor told me to calm down and relax and lay down on my back, and like assuring me that everything will be alright. But actually what it really meant was that he knew I was dying as the browning of my body continued to my left side until my whole body was brown and the sound of the voices of doctor and the people around me talking became like a sound like I was inside a box but I could see them, and when I tried to get up, I saw my body laying there, dead. So I became a spirit which separated from my body.

I could not believe it, I didn't want to accept that I was dead, I started to panic but as always I thought that it was just a bad dream and that I would wake up. Thankfully I did wake up and found out it was just a dream. And I don't know why I even wanted to write this down, because it is a very creepy dream! But well maybe it had some deeper meaning? Hmm...oh well.

Learning thru the tummyache method

So today concludes my training where I learned about integration of databases, something which really interested me regardless of the fact that I really needed it right now for my work. This is a good sign, because it means I am still open to learning new things related to information technology even if I know that given a chance (and the same salary!) to shift to a career which is "more human", I would do it in a heartbeat. :P

But you know what, I enjoyed the training mostly because of the experience I had outside the classroom. Our class was actually very small, there was just three of us -- me (Filipino), another trainee (South Indian working in Qatar) and our instructor (Malaysian Chinese). On the first day of training, when lunch break time arrived, I jokingly said to our instructor that lunch break was my favorite part of the training. But what do you know, in the end I would really mean it!

The three of us went together for lunch. Monday was free lunch at Sizzler where we had American food (yummy steak and salad), courtesy of the training company. For Tuesday, we went to a foodcourt where we had Singaporean food - I had char kway teow while the two men had Ban Mian. My Indian classmate wanted to try Singaporean food and so he just ordered the same with our instructor. It was quite amusing to watch my classmate struggle with his chopsticks, but nevertheless I think he enjoyed the experience as much as we enjoyed watching him. And I made quite an impression on our instructor too when I unintentionally stained his shirt and pants with the flying squirts from the prawn from my food when I was peeling it off. I was so embarrassed of course and I thought our instructor would take it against me. But well, on the contrary, I think it even broke the ice, as he was just a nice and cool person, the same with my classmate. On Wednesday's lunch, our instructor suggested that we go to Little India to have some Indian food and also for my classmate to have some tour. I had reservations about this, because to be honest, I am not fond of Indian food. However, I actually enjoyed the lunch at the Southern Indian restaurant we went to because my Indian classmate showed us how to eat the Southern Indian way -- on a banana leaf, you mix the different viands on the rice and eat using your hands-- and I surprisingly ended up eating A LOT! Boy, I was sooo full and I knew I would most probably have a tummyache from all the spices and curry combination. My classmate even had us try some Indian desserts. I really had a great time this day, as I also was able to have a brief tour of Little India, which I have never done before in my 3 years in Singapore. I was quite amazed at how much culture there is in that place. Then indeed, that evening I had a tummyache, but which I didn't regret the reason for obviously. Today, Thursday, my tummy has still not recovered but for lunch we had....Filipino food! I brought them to 7,107 Flavors, a Filipino restaurant where we had a sumptous feast of Filipino food on a very rainy and cold day. We were so full and I was very much glad to know that they enjoyed the Filipino food.

So you see, I went for a training and I learned a lot in the classroom. But even more, unexpectedly, I learned more important things outside the classroom, and that is, that people may come from different places, have different cultures, but in the end, we are all the same -- we all have a tummy for food! :-P

(Ok, well, I hope you get the deeper message of what I meant ;-)

Burrrrp!

Lesson of the day

I was supposed to write something fluffy today, like about my new dress I wore today and which I really liked, or something that makes a little bit of sense (and actually geeky), like how I actually enjoyed doing configurations and integration of databases during my technical training today.

But nooooo, I have to write another ranting instead! Because I was so much irritated that I wanted to scream my lungs out! Why? Because I missed my bus tonight and the next bus was another half an hour later! And all because I made another wrong choice!!!!

But you can say, so what, we're just human and we're allowed to make mistakes from time to time, right? Yes! However, look at this scenario: you think about this great big plan, which you have been thinking about the whole day, even rehersing your move and what you're gonna say over and over in your mind but then it suddenly happens when you least expect it and you just end up making a fool of yourself because you got rattled and did the exact opposite instead! To think that this has happened to me sooo many times already but I can't seem to do it right! Grrrrrrrrr!!!

Haiz...

Please do excuse me, this is just due to so much pride I have that I am making a big deal out of it. Although, really, it just gets into my nerves even if I would not like it to! Arrrggghh!!!

So the lesson of the day is: learn from your previous lessons!!!

Sigh :(

Ok, ok, I'm gonna calm down...breathe in..breathe out..breathe in..breathe out...

woosaaaaaaaaah....

My first MAC :)

And I'm not talking about the computer of course. :P

It's the MAC make up. As I was inspired by two of my girl friends (hi Mhe! :) whom I have personally seen how good they looked wearing MAC eye make up, I bought my first MAC eye shadow at Changi airport two weeks ago on my way to Ho Chi Minh. It costs 29 something SGD, which is about 10% cheaper than if you buy from the stores in Singapore.

I actually wanted the type where the colors were already mixed, however, they did not have it at the store in the airport so I settled for this two tone pink and bronze colors. Anyhow, I wore it yesterday and I am happy because it was subtle enough for day time and just nice for evening. And with a better brush, it would even look nicer for sure. Perhaps I should get myself a MAC brush next? Hmmm... ;)

When fluffyness fades...

You start to think again of those questions that you could not answer.
You start again to be anxious of what will be or what will not be.
Your emotions start climbing to the peak,
And one simple comment would burst your bubble and crash your confidence like a one strong whip.
Then you start to doubt yourself again.

I will shake this off, of course. But first, I blame this all to hormones...
Yes, it's hard being a woman.

Blue windows of the heart

What happens when you are having an emotional day and you watch Nights in Rodanthe?

You get a heart-shattering, nose runnering (if there is such a word like this, hehe), make up smudging, endless sobbing inside the cinema!

My gosh! Good thing I watched it by myself, I was crying continuously and I couldn't help sniffing loudly. It was embarrassing enough to go out of the cinema with sore eyes and a very red nose! And my gulay, I had a hard time re-doing my make up! hehehe.

Anyways, tears aside, I would like to say that I like the movie, Nights in Rodanthe, not because of the storyline (the story was based on the book by Nicholas Sparks, by the way), but rather, how well the visuals like the cinematography, the location and the very good performance of the actors was used to make a usual story become special in its own way. I especially loved the beach house! Inside and out! And the musical scores used were just perfect to supplement the lovely scenes.

Yeah, it's another chick flick which I'm sure the guys will just roll their eyes at, and for sure, who would only be caught watching it because their girlfriend or wife wanted to watch it. Yep, I'm learnin' ;-)

Geez, I'm sleepy again, to think that I just had 12 hours of sleep last night! Too much crying, I guess. :P

~~~~~~~~~~~

Photo taken from the movie's official website: http://nightsinrodanthe.warnerbros.com/

If I were a man...

...right now, what I'd like to do is to sit in a bar, order for a drink and blabber with the bar tender or some fellow stranger.

Omaritosan is bored

What happens when pseudo bf Omar gets bored at work?

He creates a chat program and uses my name for a dummy user:

oh la la... :P

a shu shu, a shu shu... :P

to-a-tee

After watching the funny movie, The House Bunny last night, I and a girl friend went around The Cathay mall and discovered to-a-tee, a nice store that sells very nice clothes, from cute tshirts to dainty day/night/beach dresses .

I got the privilege to meet the director of the store who was personally attending to the customers with another nice lady (I think it could be his aunt or a close relative). Anyways, they were very accomodating and nice and they gave us a 20% discount plus a S$20 voucher. I told them that I really love their collection. I learned that their collection are from the United States . The owner, Luke Elijah, is a designer and he goes around the world to select the clothes and stuff they sell. What a great job! I could see that this business of his was more than just a source of income, it was a passion. I wish I could do this, you know, pursue a passion and do something not for the money but just because you love doing it.

Anyhoo, so I got myself two nice dresses which are a little bit on the formal. I'm quite excited to wear them and experiment with the hair and make up style that would go with them and of course the shoes. But the only question is when and where? I guess I need to find the right ocassion to do so...

Anyone out there who wants to take me out on a formal dinner date or something? :-P

~~ to-a-tee is located in The Cathay mall in Handy Road, Singapore.

My Tennis Racket Dampener

It's been three years now that I've been playing tennis and I am very much happy of how much I have improved. I am still amazed right now when I find myself having a great rally or a game of tennis with my neighbors because I never thought my level would progress to this.

When I started playing tennis almost three years ago, I've always used a tennis racket dampener because it decreases the vibration when the racket hits the ball. And it was just great for me because I really felt the difference of having it on my racket since it made me be able to retain a stable grip and hit the balls with the correct form.

So all the while I had my dampener on my tennis racket and I had always attributed that my good strokes was because of it. Until I decided tonight to just take it off and just try what would happen. I very much expected that my hitting would turn unstable but oh boy, was I so amazed to discover that my stroke remained there and evenmore, my hits became more powerful! I really couldn't believe it, that all along I was so afraid to take it off because of the thought that I was only having good strokes because of it and all along I had been wondering why my hits wasn't that powerful even if I was hitting very hard. It was the dampener!

Therefore, this is what I've realized: there are things that are there to help us when we are just learning, to give us that firm foundation, that confidence. However, we must know when to let go of this, to discover more of our capabilities, otherwise we might get stuck thinking that we could not do more.

Do you have a dampener that you couldn't take off too?

I guess I wanted something new in my life

A new key to fit a new door
To wake and see a different view in my life
The one i've been waiting for
Dreams like everyone i've had a few in my life
Who knew that this one would come true in my life
I knew the moment when you touched me, you touched me
You're like a sudden breeze that blew in my life
A new face, a new smile, a new song
And now i know i wanted you in my life all along
I guess i must have saved an empty place in my heart
For you to come and fill that space in my heart
That long before i said i loved you, i love you
Whatever happens this is true in my life
When all those springs have come and go
Whatever doubts i've made or do in my life
Whatever else that i may do in my life
You'll always be something, girl, in my life
From now on I know there always will be you in my life
From now on

--lyrics of Stephen Bishop's song "Something New in my Life"

***********

Haha, ok, the song doesn't really have much significance to this post. Just that I suddenly remembered this song because of the first line because I wanted to write some new things that have caught my fancy recently:

Transparent shoe boxes from mujibox - saw these along a stall at Raffles MRT and may I say that this is ingenious! I bought 10 pieces (it's S$3.99 each but it's buy 5 take 5 so it's like just S$2 actually) and it has inspired me to clean the foyer and arrange my shoes neatly. I'm quite amused, really, just looking at my shoe collection. And it just coincides with my seem to be evolving shoe fetish. I've just gotten my DMK privilege card and it means I've actually bought about 5 pairs of shoes for the past 3 months! hihihi :P

Nokia 6600 fold - my new baby (awwww). I have finally decided that I needed to upgrade and catch up with technology. I have no more idea what's the latest about cellphones and so since what I only know is that the latest would be phones that are 3G (and now even 4G), I wanted to get a phone that is a clam shell type, 3G phone. Although, to be honest I don't even know what is 3G! hehehe. But thanks to Ate Prime, we now know that 3G means Third Generation and that there is actually no 2G! ahahaha. :P Anyways, it was also just in time since my old clam phone was already at the verge of saying goodbye to the world.

Painting the town red with Sally Hansen - well, actually just my toe nails only, hehe :P I just saw that I have a red nail polish, which was a gift from last Christmas, and so I thought I'd try it. So this is the first time I'm wearing a red nail polish and boy, it is screaming red. After I finished applying them and I looked at my feet, I said to myself it wasn't me but it does not look bad at all, so I think I just need some getting used to it. ;)

Alrighty, there goes some vanity! ;)