There's a rainbow always after the rain

It's another Monday once again. Another start of a work week. Still have to find yet how I could jumpstart myself to get some things done today, hopefully after lunch I'll get that push.

Anyhow, since my chili friends seem to have some music inspired blog entries lately, I would like to do the same.

Chili babe Aoisoba is singing goodbye hopeless dreams

Chili babe Ays is singing taking chances

Chili babe Diovabe is singing about the man who can't be moved

Here's what I'm singing (and this is also for you, chili babe Eypooh):

What's your song for today?

Of broken trust and giving up

May I share with you this story from one of my most treasured books, Like the Flowing River by Paulo Coelho:

Charity Under Threat

Some time ago, my wife went to the aid of a Swiss tourist in Ipanema, who claimed he had been robbed by some street children. Speaking appalling Portuguese in a thick foreign accent, he said that he had been left without his passport, without any money, and with nowhere to sleep.

My wife bought him lunch, gave him enough cash to pay for a hotel room for the night while he got in touch with his embassy, and then left. Days later, a Rio newspaper reported that this 'Swiss tourist' was, in fact, an inventive con-artist who put on an accent and abused the good faith of those of us who love Rio and want to undo the negative image - justified or not - that has become our postcard.

When she read the article, my wife simply said: 'Well, that's not going to stop me helping anyone.'

Her remark reminded me of the story of a wise man who moved to the city of Akbar. No one took much notice of him, and his teachings were not taken up by the populace. After a time, he became the object of their mockery and their ironic comments.

One day, while he was walking down the main street in Akbar, a group of men and women began insulting him. Instead of pretending he had not noticed, the wise man turned to them and blessed them.

One of the men said:

'Are you deaf too? We call you the foulest of names and yet you respond with sweet words!'

'We can each of us only offer what we have,' came the wise man's reply.

~o~o~o~

One of the things that deeply hurts is a broken trust. It hurts to the point that it could even be traumatic, especially when it not only happened once, but more than twice or thrice. It makes you want to just give up altogether.

But why should we give up the fight? It would just make the bad people prevail in this world. The lost of trust in mankind is what makes us live in disharmony, because we are afraid to be outwitted by the other.

But if we let this fear take over us, we will never find peace. The heart's function is to love, and when the heart gets broken and we keep it like that it would never heal up and fulfil what is was made for. It is just like driving: when you get into an accident because of another person's fault, should you let it scare you and stop you from driving anymore? No. Otherwise, you will end up totally losing confidence on yourself and forgetting how to drive.

It is not easy to do this, I know. For it is but natural that our defenses would go up when we get hurt. But then again, it does not mean we should let it shut us out from love. We learn from mistakes from facing it instead of running away from it. It is the way for us to be better equipped, to be stronger and wiser than before. Of course, it is no guarantee that we would never get hurt anymore. There is always a risk involved. But then again, I do believe that the heart is strong. As long as we keep it beating, it will one day finally find the one true soul that it lives in search for.

And it will be all worth it.

I pray and thank God for the good people in this world who remain with unfaltered spirits amidst all the hardships encountered.

Blessed be those who are lost, may they realize that the way for their selves to become whole is not by breaking others.

WTF!!!!

This is unbelievable!!!!

The world is full of freakin' schizos!!!!

Be very careful, be really very careful.

They now come in forms you wouldn't easily recognize. Better upgrade your schizo radars!

Seriously.

Isa Kang Malaking Palitaw!

This entry is dedicated to my pretty chili friend, Ays, who is obviously blooming.

Why so?

Must be because she's crossed over to the dark side...not! :-P

Must be because she just got back from a short holiday in Hong Kong....not! :-P

But I think it has something to do with both things, hehehe *wink*wink*

Wish her bloom would rub off on me, I sure could use some right now.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrggggggghhh!!!!

I have just discovered that I have deleted all my pictures from Hanoi from my camera without having uploaded them to my hard drive!!! It is plain stupid of me!!! I would like to strangle myself right now!!!

:(

No, they are not in the recycle bin.

Another Starbucks city mug adventure

14 Sept 2008
5:08pm
Tokyo, Japan

So here I am again at Narita airport. I have been thinking about it and realized that this is my eighth time here. Imagine that, eight times I've been here in Japan but I've never seen it still. Talk about being in a place physically, but not actually being there.

Anyways, since my flight from LA was an hour ahead of its scheduled arrival here, I have three hours layover. I've never explored this airport before since usually my layovers were just an hour or two, just enough to go through the security checks, freshen up in the washroom and find the next gate. Well, now I had some more time, so I went around, in search of Starbucks. I was excited when I found it on the map and even more when I got into the store. I was amazed to find city mugs, in a different style than the ones I was used to. What a joy to see those colorful mugs! I settled to buy the Tokyo mug since I've only been here to Tokyo. Well, in fact, just what I have said earlier, I don't even know if this qualifies as being here but well, come on, I've been here 8 times.

Anyhow, it was fun buying that Tokyo mug plus a Soy latte because the barista didn't speak English except for two or three words but we understood each other when he asked me if I'd like to have the mug gift wrapped and when I asked if I could pay by credit card. It was nice, even if I have no idea how much I paid for that (I do not have an idea of the foreign exchange conversion for JPY).

The Conclusion to the San Diego Fable

Two years ago, an ugly duckling got lost and cried in the zoo. But the ugly duckling found a friend in the white swan. Life continued then with such a better one, having each other from then on as light. Now, the ugly duckling understands why the string got caught up to its feet. It was not because the string was actually tied up but merely because the ugly duckling was pulling on to it. When the ugly duckling let go, it was like the string never existed.

Thank you, Captain Marvel.

Now, Supergirl can fly.

Thoughts from the Riverside yard

Wednesday, 5:25pm

Riverside, CA

Sitting here on my purple sarong that I laid on the grass in the frontyard, with music playing in my earphones; with the California sun still shining (but about to set) and the cool breeze on my hair and face, I can say that this moment is one of my most relaxed state.

.

.

And thoughts were written down, which will either be remembered or will just be part of another archive...

Thursday, 10:48am
Riverside, CA

I'm in the backyard. Almost the same setting as yesterday in the front yard. Only now it's morning and I'm sitting on a comfortable garden chair. And here, I'm sure grandpa won't be able to accidentally lock me out, hehehe.

I'm almost regreting what I had written down yesteday, especially after having a nightmare last night, which obviously was because I have been thinking about my fears, my paranoia, and only to wake up this morning and find out that my nightmare came true.

But good thing this is something that I could still shake off. Nothing that mugs of coffee and good dance music on my earphones couldn't shake off.

And thank God for technology, my friends are just an email away.

Please return to your seatbelts

So, I'm back in sunny California. For this trip from Los Angeles to Washington DC and back, we took a flight with Virgin America and I am very much impressed with their aircraft and service that I really just have to make a write up about it.

They have a very cool plane interior: with mood lights, the white back seats and they have the biggest leg room in all the airplanes I've been onto, even more than the Boeing 747's. It's quite amazing, really, for an A320 aircraft since I could really see the difference compared with other airlines I've flown with their A320 aircraft.

Plus, they have a cool entertainment system which they call Red (runs on Linux operating system using Red Hat) where you can listen to music, watch movies, TV or MTVs and most importantly, order food! It makes a big difference in terms of convenience, right? Water and soda are free, but for alcohol drinks as well as some pay per view movies, you could pay it thru your credit card right then and there as well. They also have a very cool safety video, they used cartoons instead of the usual stiff acting cabin crews, hehehe.

Lastly, the crew were trained to be cool in the way they make announcements too, not the usual formal scripted announcements. I noticed that they make it sound animated, so just like talking in a tone like talking to someone you know. It's really nice. It was really entertaining especialy on our way back from DC to LA, the cabin crew who made the announcements seemed new because while he tried to have the animated, informa tone, he sounded nervous and made some mistakes, he actually said "Please return to your seatbelts" at one time.

And what about the price? It's actually even cheaper than the other local flights from other airlines. Definitely value for money.

Check out their website: http://www.virginamerica.com/va/home.do

The Legend of the Starbucks NYC mug

The usual souvenir I get when I go to a place besides a magnet and a shotglass is a Starbucks city mug. When I first went to New York three years ago, I have not started this collection, and maybe the Starbucks city mug might not have been existing yet cause I only started collecting them 2 years ago. Anyhow, I have not had any difficulty getting these city mugs in the cities I've been to including the major cities here in United States like LA, San Francisco and Washington DC. The mugs are usually available in the first Starbucks store I go into. They even have one in Bali, Indonesia.

And so I was quite surprised to find out that in Manhattan, where I think there would have the most number of Starbucks stores, the New York city mug was not available. Just around the area in Times Square there's almost one at every two blocks. However, I went to six different stores and there was no city mug! In the fifth store, we asked the staff about it and she seemed to have no idea what we were talking about. It made me wonder if the Starbucks New York city mug do exist. On the 6th store, when I asked if they have the mug, I got my hopes up when the guy said he thinks they may have it and looked at their stock shelves but...alas, nada. But he did confirm it actually exists when I verified with him if it does really exist, they just ran out of it. But then again, what if we weren't talking about the same thing? Coz isn't it so odd that all 6 stores had run out of stock? If those mugs were that in demand, surely Starbucks would have thought of producing more and sellingmore, right? So I left New York city without a Starbucks city mug with me :(

I think my family has been challenged and intrigued with this mug now. On our drive back from NY to Maryland, my new brother in law pulled the car over a stopover place in New Jersey where there was Starbucks. He said maybe they would have the NYC mug or if not, maybe a New Jersey mug, but as I have expected, nothing. Then when we made another stop over after a couple of hours, I finally found a Starbucks city mug. But it's not New York city mug, it was a Philadelphia mug but what the heck, I just bought it anyways, since my only condition for having a city mug is that I should have been to that city. And even if we're just driving through, we did stop there, so I guess that counts. I felt something odd about buying that Philadelphia mug though so I asked my new bro-in-law where we were actually. He just smiled at me. I looked at my receipt, we were in Delaware. Nyek. :/

That's love

He's been in love with her since highschool. He joined the school choir just to be with her. She's turned him down for so many times. I can still remember those days a little more than a decade ago when she would tell me how annoyed she was with his persistence.

I've seen her grow up into a fine young lady, witnessed how she fell in and out of her first love, then fell in love again and got deeply hurt. I've seen her cry her heart out and tried to hold on to something that wasn't there. He has been living thousands of miles away but he has been there all along, not leaving her.

And today, I've witnessed them take each other as husband and wife, to have and to hold, to love, to cherish and be faithful to each other, for as long as they live.

When my sister accepted his proposal to marry him, I asked her how was she able to know that he was the right man for her. She answered that with the right man, the things that happened that led to her being hurt would be corrected, like re-living the events once more but this time they happen in the right way. I admire her for that, for her courage. After getting hurt, she had been cautious but she did not get afraid, and she never gave up on love. Perhaps, I too should still give love a chance.

Kayan and Mac

5 Sept 2008

Old Town Alexandria, Virginia

This entry is brought to you by the number 10

Nasamid - this is a Tagalog verb which I can't think of any direct word transalation in English. But it is what happens when you make a discoordination between your swallowing and breathing and you choke a bit in what you're eating or drinking.

So this happened to me this afternoon while eating icecream at the park in front of the White House. We Filipinos have a belief that when this happens to you, it means somebody must be thinking of you or could be talking about you. And so we usually ask someone for a number to know the first letter of the name of the person who that could be. So I asked my big sister for a number and she answered number 10 and I counted:

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J...

Hmmnnn....

Won't you tell me how to get, how to get to Washington, DC? :P

Sleepless in Maryland

It's 4:38a.m. here in Maryland and I can't seem to make myself go sleep.

Could it be because I slept most of the time during the flight from LA to DC?

But it was just 5 hours of flight and I only had a couple of hours' sleep the night before so I should be knackered by now.

Could it be because this is the first time I am in this place?

Nah, I'm used to travelling and sleeping in different places. I can even sleep in a tent at a campsite.

Could it be because I ate too much ice cream for dessert last night?

Well, my stomach did get a bit upset from the milk but not really much to disturb me.

Could it be because of the big mug of coffee I had at midnight?

Maybe. But then again, I am used to having coffee at any time of the day and I think I'm already actually immune to it.

Could it be because of the new timezone I am at?

Ahh, yes, perhaps that's it. It's actually just 1:38am in California and I have only just adjusted to the West coast time coming from Singapore time, then now I'm in another time zone and I have yet to adjust on the east coast time. Yeah, maybe my body clock is quite confused right now.

Could that be really the reason? Or is there something else in my mind?

Hmmm, perhaps there is.

Will this dream come true?

1 Sept 2008
Anaheim, CA

When you wish upon a star...

While waiting for the fireworks in front of Sleeping beauty's castle tonight, there was a guy who asked the security if they could have a quick photo session at the area in front of the castle which was already secured. I think it was for pre-nuptial photos. The security was kind enough to let them so they posed and took pictures there in front of the crowd. Their last pose was the guy kneeling down to the girl and holding her hand. Then some of the people applaused after that, I think they found it sweet or perhaps they thought it was a marriage proposal.

I smiled. I found it sweet too as I admired how the guy was very determined to get a photo there with his beloved. (Sigh) That's love.

Then a thought suddenly crossed my mind: I asked myself, would I like to be proposed at in front of hundreds of people? Well, I don't really feel comfortable to be the center of attention, and I wouldn't want that special moment to become like a theatre play, but at the same time, I do would like to have some kind of spotlight on me on this moment. Then voila, suddenly, I just knew what would be the perfect way of proposing marriage to me. I actually surprised myself a bit, because I thought I'm already jaded and that I have already made myself stop thinking of these cheesy things. But well, I was in Disneyland and it is a happy place so I guess I only had happy thoughts.

Anyways, I am going to write it down and then I will forget about it after this. Here goes: I would be someplace with a lot of people, but it would be in a happy place, something like...yeah, Disneyland. I would be in the middle of a crowd of people walking their own ways on one sunny day, and I would be waiting for him since he said he'd just go get something and said he'll be back quickly. So I wait, and then I look at the happy people passing around me -- happy children, happy parents, happy young couples.

I smile. And I think about my beloved and I start to look out for him, for his return. I look out at the throngs of people who do not know me and who do not know him. He's not there. Then I look around and around again, still not there. Where could he be? I wonder.

Then I look out once more and there, in the crowd, I see a familiar face, and our eyes lock and he holds up one arm to reveal two dozens of very red roses he is holding. He smiles as he starts to walk towards me. And there, with hundreds of people, it will feel like it is just me and him that is there. Then he stops in front of me, hands me the roses and kneels down. He takes my right hand and says the magical words as he holds out the ring that is only meant for me. I will say yes and we will kiss and embrace tightly. And we will live happily ever after...

Indeed, I hope that this dream is one those that do come true...

Other more time worthy stuff

(In no particular order)

1. Inquire about Pump tennis (http://www.mbpsports.com/)
2. Spring clean our flat: my bedroom, my bathroom, the kitchen, laundry area, dining area, living room, foyer...everything!
3. Think of a way to actually make myself do a regular maintenance cleaning of our flat.
4. Read my backlog books and my new books.
5. Organize my personal documents.
6. Write more thoughts.
7. Review my elementary french and start on intermediate.
8. Use up my remaining movie vouchers before Sept 17
9. Take a photo of this certain gazebo I fancy.
10. Do not let myself think of work outside office hours.
11. Go out more with friends.
12. Think about investments(?)
13. Learn to bake.
14. Sign up at marathons.
15. Volunteer at YMCA.
16. Plan a travel with my parents.
17. Find a way to get to Guam from Singapore in December without getting broke.
18. Change my tennis racket handle grip.
19. Print my parents' travel photos.
20. Clean up, organize and back up my files.
21. Get new curtains for the living room and my bedroom.
22. Organize my playlists in my Zen player.
23. Attend more dance classes.
24. Inquire on flute lessons.
25. Create a website for my little sister's church wedding.
26. Go for a regular swim in our condo's pool.
27. Ride the luge in Sentosa.
28. Catch up with people I miss.
29. Buy pillowcases in Chinatown that my mother wanted.
30. Find out how to make my pimples disappear and not appear again.
31. Go to church.
32. Create that concluding blog entry.


There, that should keep me occupied!

Fascination and Hyperventilation

These two are parts in the cycle that I have seem to be into in relation with men eversince I made myself available in the ocean.

Fascination would be the first part. A man gets fascinated with me, maybe because I am friendly, I am bubbly. And perhaps because I have that naive look on me and then he gets amused to find out that I am actually capable of becoming daring.

Then I get serious. I fall for him. And I start to show my deep, thinking side.

Which leads to the second part of the cycle: hyperventilation. Hyperventilation is when you cannot breathe properly; you take breaths in short intervals, like you are running out of air, gasping; and your heart beats faster than normal; it would be like that of an asthma attack, I suppose. This happens because at some point, I would encounter an experience that would indicate to me that this man's fascination to me has ended. It will happen in such a way that I would feel like an ice cold pail of water is thrown on my head, at the moment I am not expecting it. Then yes, the hyperventilation follows after. The pail of water actually has a pattern too -- usually, it'll be in the form of another woman.

So it'll hurt. After all the effort and putting your guards down to express that you like him, you would get an in-your-face-slap of icing that says the joke is on you.

Well, ok, maybe I'm just gullible. And I guess it's just me and all of what I'm doing are all just self-inflicted?
Hello?!?!? Why would I want to torture myself?!?!

Fine, if that's the name of the game, then I'm outta it. Am I sounding so bitter now? Hmm, I'm not really bitter. I'm just tired. I'm tired of all these games that men play. I don't find it flattering at all to be approached by men who think I'm an easy prey. Before, I used to give the benefit of the doubt and extend my patience but now I just want to put a sign board in front of me to say:

"Stay away if you just want to play. Please don't waste my time. I'm a good girl. And even if I tried to be wild, the thing is, I was designed to be just the girl-next-door. I'm not somebody made to be just a fling. I'm someone you bring home to your parents. I'm naive, I'm gullible.Oh, I'm boring? Fine. I'm sure you'll find lots of fun girls out there, I am not competing with them. Bye."

Anyway, my point is, I am really, really, really, tired from all of this. I am tired of being like always up on my toes, waiting for the catch, you know that pail of water to end it all even when things seemed to be happy. I'm just so done with all these. I am not letting it happen again. I don't care if I would seem unreceptive or cold, I am not exerting extra effort anymore, even if I like him.

But what if I finally have met Mr. Right? Well, too bad, since he came at this point, he just have to endure the consequences that the other Mr. Wrongs have brought about. I know I am not being fair, but at this point, I have to take precaution now, I have to take care of myself or totally lose the remaining trust I have left for the male specie. Besides, if he is the Mr. Right, he would stick around, to break the cycle, to tell me that he is staying and that he is not just passing through my life. He is going to melt the heart that I have already frozen. And there is no catch, just sincere true love.

There, all's said. Now, let's move on to other more time worthy stuff.

When You and Me is You and Me and not Just Me

I've just attended a friend's civil wedding. It was my first time to actually witness a Singapore Rites of Marriage ceremony (bride and groom are Filipino). It was a simple ceremony held at the living room of their flat, with a few friends gathered. And I was deeply moved as I cannot help but admire the sincerity of their wedding. You can really see how true friends help you make your special day be really special, no matter how simple; from their flatmates who decorated their place, a simple program organized, friends who took the the photographs and video.

During the ceremony, when they were saying their vows and signing their marriage certificate, I realized to myself that oh my God, we are really adults now and we can actually get married to anyone at anytime if we want to, no matter what anyone says. My friends are a few years younger than I and they made a decision to spend the rest of their lives together, no matter what, no matter if there were objections from anyone. And I admired them for that, as I know what they have gone through, how they have fought for their love. I admire my friend very much, for being strong because she knows how much she loves him, and I admire her husband, because he took his stand for her, that's how much he loves her. It makes my heart feel warm, that in these modern times when things get more and more jaded, there are still love stories like my friends' which proves that love, yes, that romantic love that bursts out with determination, still exists.

I can't help but remember my first love that I gave up. The story was similar as my friends', only it did not end the same obviously. Everyone did not understand why I gave it up, everyone thought we were a perfect couple and it was a perfect relationship. It wasn't. And I wouldn't have given up if I knew that I wasn't alone in my battle. It wasn't even a you-and-me-against-the-world drama, it was just mine. I have no regrets for ending that relationship, I felt sad for the good memories, yes, because I know he loved me sincerely, but I knew that it wasn't enough and it had to end and even if anyone ask me now, 5 years after it ended, if I would still do the same, I would answer a straight yes, I would still decide the same. There are certain things that just wasn't meant to be and you just know that it is already over.

Focus, focus

Don't let the rain get you.

Breathe...

Focus, focus.

I can do this.

Bon courage....

7,107 reasons to go back to the Philippines

It has been raining the past few days during the morning, and it's not just the usual Singapore rain, it had been raining really hard, with strong winds, thunder and lightning. This morning was again another one. Perhaps these rains might be related to the typhoon in the Philippines, which I heard was very strong. It's going down south, so maybe...But the good thing about here in Singapore is that there are no typhoons, and rains last for only a few hours, and so I expected that the rain would stop by noon and my BBQ + Swimming party in the afternoon would go as planned.

By early afternoon, the rain did stop, although the weather remained cloudy. I prepared the food for the party: tilapia fish, squid, pork chops, chicken, corn, marshmallows and the dish i most enjoyed preparing -- the Japanese style skewer of asparagus wrapped in bacon. It was a lot of work but I was happy because I think this was the first time I hosted a party at my place in my 3 years of my residence there. Not that I didn't want to, but I live in the northwest part of Singapore and most of my friends live in the east and therefore, my area was not really a choice for party venues. I am often teased that I already live in Malaysia, which I don't mind being teased about, because my place is indeed near the border of Johor Bahru :) But the west is very homey and tranquil, so even if most of my friends like the east because it was nearer the city, I still preferred to stay where I was. Anyways, 5pm arrived and my friends started to arrive, and after a couple of hours and some unexpected challenge to make the fire start and make some good charcoal burning, we finally managed to get the food cooked.

I had a lovely and fun evening with my good friends over our yummy barbecue dinner. For dessert we had some of my two "birthday" cakes which a couple of friends brought. Yeah, it wasn't my birthday but I think in some way it was, as I am about to do something that would be like my rebirth.

I believe that there comes a time in your life that somehow you feel like you lost yourself -- from trying to catch up with people's expectations, with the norms, with your own goals, with the bites of reality, with heartaches; from having no choice but to grow up and become an adult. And what better way to find yourself again than to trace back from where you grew up.

So, I am going back to the Philippines, my land, my home, my roots.

The Trial of the Just

A month down the road, I am back on my feet, moving on. However, there are still times that will hit me and suddenly I will feel scared and weak and I start to question again why things happened as such and why I had to suffer even if my intentions are pure. During my weakest days, both my mother and my mom advised me to pray. My mom said to call on the holy spirit to be with me, my mother said to read the Proverbs. Indeed, mothers know best; I opened my Bible and read the one that made me have a good sleep that night.

Psalm 73

1 A psalm of Asaph.

How good God is to the upright, the Lord,

to those who are clean of heart!

2 But as for me, I lost my balance; my feet all but slipped,

3 Because I was envious of the arogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

4 For they suffer no pain; their bodies are healthy and sleek.

5 They are free of the burdens of life; they are not afflicted like others.

6 This pride adorns them as a necklace; violence clothes them as a robe

7 Out of their stupidity comes sin; evil thoughts flood their hearts

8 They scoff and spout their malice; from on high they utter threats.

9 They set their mouths against the heavens, their tongues roam the earth.

10 So my people turn to them and drink deeply of their words.

11 They say, "Does God really know?", "Does the Most High have any knowledge?"

12 Such, then, are the wicked, always careferee, increasing their wealth.
13 Is it in vain that I have kept my heart clean, washed my hands in innocence?

14 For I am afflicted day after day, chastised every morning.

15 Had I thought, "I wil speak as they do," I would have betrayed your people.

16 Though I tried to understand all this, it was too difficult for me

17 Till I entered the sanctuary of God and came to understand their end.

18 You set them, indeed, on a slippery road; you hurl them down to ruin.

19 How suddenly they are devastated; undone by disasters forever!

20 They are like a dream after waking Lord, dismissed like shadows when you arise.
21 Since my heart was embittered and my sould deeply wounded,

22 I was stupid and could not understand; I was like a brute beast in your presence.

23 Yet I am always with you;

24 With your counsel you guide me, and at the end receive me with honor.

25 Whom else have I in the heavens? None beside you delights me on earth.

26 Though my flesh and my heart fail, God is the rock of my heart, my portion forever.

27 But those who are far from you perish; you destroy those unfaithful to you.

28 As for me, to be near God is my good, to make the Lord God my refuge.I shall declare all your works in the gates of daughter Zion.

**********

This is for us, missy. Let's not give up.