Why I have not been blogging lately - other reasons

• Had some visitors. My Aunt (my mother's sister) was here in Singapore with her two friends. They were here for a short vacation with a side trip to Kuala Lumpur. On their last night in Singapore they stayed at my place. It was fun hearing about their adventures as they had many bloopers like going inside a church here, prayed the rosary and then found out after that it was an Anglican Church; and insisting to the taxi driver in KL to take them to the bus station they said against the persistence of the taxi driver that it was the wrong bus station and in the end realized the taxi driver was right. But they were so cool about everything and laughed their hearts out as they recall them. They referred to themselves as the "golden girls" and I could not agree more -- 3 lovely ladies in their 50's with successful professional careers, all single. When I was growing up the elders used to tease me about having the potential to follow my Aunt's footsteps, with me having this independent personality and strong will. While I was with the golden girls, this thought did pass to me like a cold wind gushing on my skin...I asked myself, am I the next generation? The thing is, being a golden girl was my aunt's choice: when I was child,I clearly remember her saying to my grandfather that she had no plans of getting married. As for me, do I really have a choice?


• Had to catch up with my French. I missed one (very important) lesson during my vacation down under. There was quite a load of homework plus, I had to study for the exam yesterday night. I did fine with my oral but I had a hard time with my written because I was not able to memorize the conjugations of many irregular verbs. I did try to prepare for it yesterday afternoon -- while I was at work I created this beautiful list of these verbs and their conjugations but before I could start to do some memorization, I had to work on a Production issue and by 6:30pm I was still in the office. I arrived half an hour late for my exam, and much as I tried to remember my verbs, I could squeeze only the thoughts of my still unresolved Production issue from my brain cells. Oh well, I really do have no excuse actually because I did have some time to study days ahead but I have not been taking my French classes very seriously, I mean, I know I could be more diligent in studying it but because it was not really something that I chose to learn but more of a necessity for me to survive in my job, I am not really that receptive or enthusiastic.


• Had to get used to (or rather accept) going back to my routine again. That includes going to work in the first place. I still have not found my motivation back about my job. It's been months now but there has been no improvement, sometimes I think it is even getting worse and I feel like a wilting flower or in a more techy simile, like a toy car running out of batteries, no matter how hard you push the remote control forward, it just wouldn't accelerate anymore. My friends say I have twochoises to settle this: a change in perspective or a change in job. I've tried the former but I am not sure if I tried hard enough, I am also trying the latter but Ihave not found any. I've proven many times that things happen when it's time, things I ask for is given in the right time. If something is for you, it will come like the most natural thing but when something is not, you must know when to surrender and accept your fate. This is the challenging (and also confusing) part, how to know if you are exerting enough effort and at the same time be able to know when enough is enough. Well, I guess only time will tell...