Friday, August 22, 2008

When You and Me is You and Me and not Just Me


I've just attended a friend's civil wedding. It was my first time to actually witness a Singapore Rites of Marriage ceremony (bride and groom are Filipino). It was a simple ceremony held at the living room of their flat, with a few friends gathered. And I was deeply moved as I cannot help but admire the sincerity of their wedding. You can really see how true friends help you make your special day be really special, no matter how simple; from their flatmates who decorated their place, a simple program organized, friends who took the the photographs and video.

During the ceremony, when they were saying their vows and signing their marriage certificate, I realized to myself that oh my God, we are really adults now and we can actually get married to anyone at anytime if we want to, no matter what anyone says. My friends are a few years younger than I and they made a decision to spend the rest of their lives together, no matter what, no matter if there were objections from anyone. And I admired them for that, as I know what they have gone through, how they have fought for their love. I admire my friend very much, for being strong because she knows how much she loves him, and I admire her husband, because he took his stand for her, that's how much he loves her. It makes my heart feel warm, that in these modern times when things get more and more jaded, there are still love stories like my friends' which proves that love, yes, that romantic love that bursts out with determination, still exists.

I can't help but remember my first love that I gave up. The story was similar as my friends', only it did not end the same obviously. Everyone did not understand why I gave it up, everyone thought we were a perfect couple and it was a perfect relationship. It wasn't. And I wouldn't have given up if I knew that I wasn't alone in my battle. It wasn't even a you-and-me-against-the-world drama, it was just mine. I have no regrets for ending that relationship, I felt sad for the good memories, yes, because I know he loved me sincerely, but I knew that it wasn't enough and it had to end and even if anyone ask me now, 5 years after it ended, if I would still do the same, I would answer a straight yes, I would still decide the same. There are certain things that just wasn't meant to be and you just know that it is already over.

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