My first Singapore haircut

For a year that I've been here in Singapore, I've never had my hair done here because it is waaaaay more expensive here. I always waited to go home to Philippines since I go home usually every 3 months.

But this time I couldn't wait anymore, I had to have a haircut. My little sister can attest to that, she knows I really needed to have my hair fixed as she's seen it in it's most terrifying state.

And also I have been down lately, and I wanted something changed, improved, and usually my hair gets to do this challenging task of making me feel better. :P

Anyway, my hair is almost down to my waist line, and it has gone dead dry since it has been more than six months since I last went for a haircut.

So I went to a recommended hairsalon here and sat at the "judgement chair". For me, going for a haircut was always a risk, because you never know if the hairstylist will not murder your hair (like their definition of trim is cut 6 inches off your hair), unless you have a tried and tested hairstylist. So the first time with a new hairstylist is always a risk. Plus, I was going to spend hundreds of dollars! But good thing the hairstylist was really kind and she was very good and I felt she was just being concerned when she asked me if I comb my hair (see how terrible my hair was? hahaha). So after almost 4 hours and 350 singapore dollars, I went out of the salon with a satisfied smile. I am glad I took the risk because my hair deserves to be happy.

The Fading

Unsmiled smile

Waiting to be remembered

Waiting to be had

To mortalize the fantasy

To mortalize a phantom

Put a face behind the mask

Save the dying heart

Revive the graceful soul

Revive the shining light

For time almost ends

For tears almost dry

The blackness arrives

Two new books!

I love books and to be given a book as a gift is a great joy to me. It shows how much a person knows me. But the more interesting thing is the choice of book, that will truly indicate how fond that person is of me.

I got two new books last week. They are from two very important people in my life and I am deeply touched because their gifts show that they know me very well.



My new book #1
Common Phrases And Where They Come From
by Myron Korach in collaboration with John Mordock
First Lyons Press paperback edition, 2002


This was given to me by my Tito* Michael. On my way out from office last Tuesday night, our office secretary called me to hand me a package. Tito Michael sent me this book all the way from Riverside, California. What a treat!

He is really so thoughtful. He has seen my fascination with the idioms I heard him say during my vacation in their home last month. It's really interesting because the idioms he were using were those I don't usually read from books, perhaps they were more of conversational idioms native to California(?). So I found it really interesting, I've always been fascinated with the English language. Anyway, the book is about where the common phrases or idioms we use came from. It's really fun to read, it is not something like a text book that is trying to teach you history. It is written in an interesting way that'll make you just turn the pages.



My new book #2

Sunshine

by Robin McKinley

Published by The Penguin Group 2004

This book was a gift to me by my very good friend Mhean as a makeup gift. We recently had a misunderstanding but it turned out to be a blessing in disguise as it paved way for us to prove that we are true friends to each other. Isn't it a treasure to know how much you are valued as a friend?

The book was about vampires, and I am really moved about Mhean's choice of book. It makes me smile to realize she knows me that much, that she's one of the few who knows my fascination about vampires. The even more amazing thing is how specifically she knows what type of vampire story I like, because the book is about a vampire fairytale! ;-)

I have two new books. They may just be two of the thousands printed of their same kind but my two new books have been made unique and priceless by two very dear people in my life.

***********
*Tito - Tagalog for Uncle

Quitting catechism class (again?)

This is not new. Seven months ago, I've been pondering on the same thing.

But many Sundays passed and I was diligently present, even the once in a while weekday or Saturday meetings for ad hoc activities. Somehow, I did manage to hold on to it..maybe because I hunger for learning God's words, I wanted to learn more about my faith. Which could probably explain why it was not sustainable. My intentions for staying in the class seems to be selfish. I stayed on for my own learning but I forgot that my goal should have been for the students to learn and develop their faith. I did try, but it was too much for me. I attribute it to cultural difference, because I was not confident enough to handle the intimidation of these teenagers as well as my co-catechishts and co-parishioners, it was hard to connect to them because I am from the third world, and they are from the first world. I speak and think differently. I have confusion and sadness inside me right now, battling for guilt not to eat me, and telling myself that God is not hating me for my decision to quit the class. But guilt is trying to trick me, convincing me that I have gone cold on God and that I will not be able to look straight at my co-catechists and the students when I see them at church. Perhaps yes, but then again I also know my heart is for God and I only want to do what I think would be best. Right now I am in the process of getting my own light before I could share it to others. I cannot get the light if doubts are clouding over me. I am not stopping here, I am just rerouting to a better path, where I feel that my way is still about the spirit and not the religion.

Do you ever feel

Like you want to fly and then when you learn how and you start to soar higher is when you realize that your foot is actually tied to a string in a tree?

Like smiling and jumping for joy but you couldn't because it would cause another to cry?

I do
and I don't like it.

Temporary Tennis Timeout

I have fully recovered from the flu (as well as my li'l sister, thank God!) and just in time as my tennis instructor asked if I was back in Singapore. So tonight I resumed my tennis lessons and two months of no tennis, here's my status check:

My swing? Gone.

My grip? Gone.

My form? Gone.

My footwork? Gone.

My desire to bring them back?
All there. And that is all that matters.

I think in life this really happens, sometimes we lose the ability to do something after not practicing for a time, and it's just not physical activities, but even mental, emotional and spiritual abilities (and yes, we may even forget how to love). However, I also believe that abstinence or lack of practice will not make you totally forget, as once you learn it by heart, it will not be forgotten but may just be put in your "storage". Sometimes, it may not even be our choice to abstain from doing what we used to do by heart, as it may be inevitable on certain circumstances. But the important thing is, as long as you are determined to re-learn an ability, you will definitely gain it back (and yes, I do believe we can remember how to love again).